Plastic knuckledusters: The latest threat to our precious bodily fluids

Friends, back before 9/11, when I was dopey kid, I bought a plastic shiv at a gun show with my Dad. Why? Because back in the 1980s there was less fluoride in the water and kids generally didn’t bring guns to school. I don’t know. Apparently giving a 13-year-old a shiv back then was OK.

Anyway, this shiv was designed to get past metal detectors, just like these ridiculous looking Lexan knuckle-dusters. While the average person would say “Huh, that’s stupid,” Cleaveland reporter Douchey McUpinarms feels they are the dirty bomb of the West Market, making cole slaw of heads from here to Akron.

Kids and the criminal-minded will use anything to beat your head in. They’ll jab you with a pencil or beat you with a bottle. Just because it’s plastic and it looks like a weapon and you somehow ban it doesn’t make you any safer. Some kid will buy a plastic shiv and stick you and then you’ve got another issue to contend with… and another and another. Education not alarm, people. Education not alarm.

via BBG