Gadget translates baby's cries into various moods


Taking a page from the Baby Translator invented by Homer Simpson’s half-brother Herb Powell, the $100 “Why Cry Baby Analyzer” attempts to help parents figure out what their wailing bundle of joy is so upset about. While not as accurate as the Baby Translator from the Simpsons (“I have soiled myself… how embarrassing”) the WCBA can apparently detect the following dispositions: hungry, bored, annoyed, sleepy, and stressed.


So does it work? Who knows? One thing’s for sure, though, only the “hungry” setting really necessitates any serious action. If I were a parent, I’d be a bit put off by a “bored” reading.

Oh, you’re bored? You sit around and consume resources all day without recontributing to the family’s economic bottom line. Shall I turn on the Teletubbies for you? High definition or standard?

Oh my, you’re annoyed? I’ll try to be more quiet when getting ready in the morning. You’ve got a long day of crapping your pants and sleeping, after all. My apologies!

Why Cry Baby Analyzer []